So were parked on a random street in brantford and we did the old “sleep in the van” thing last night. And man does it sucks waking up to rain smashing off our hollo roof. Almost impossible to sleep. Specially when my mind is going crazy thinking about her.
Hamilton tonight and then a couple days off. Wish we were touring for 4 more months.
Last night we played Windsor. Venue was alright more of a bar but we rocked it and I think it sounded dope. I never get nervous but when I play Windsor for some reason I’m always so nervous. But it was good to be home. Went out with the band and a real chill babe. But the real reason for this rant was my friends… It’s crazy how fast things can change. The 4 main people i chilled with all had grown up so much and it’s crazy to see them and think of them as mature older adults and I’m at the same age level just on a whole other lifestyle level. It’s weird because I wonder if I never moved away if I would have ended up like all my close friends who are all almost married. I’m happy with how things are working out and I just met probably the coolest girl there is!
Things are good
End of the first night and it was such a great success we NAILED it tonight! So excited for this tour. CD released today. I love all the positive feedback ao far! Man I can’t get this girl out of my head!
tonights show was mad tight! we had so much fun! my wrist REALLY hurts and it sucks but im gonna keep playing and pushing past the pain. I just love it! i love the feeling of being on stage and just entertaining people and just ROCKIN OUT! such a great feeling to play something that means so much to mean and have other people enjoy it with me. we have such a good team inside and out. the boys in my band were bros and i love the chemistry. justin our merch man helper dude he is so supportive and its sweet to have. on this tour our tour managers runnin ron and peter 2 best dudes there is! so thank ful tonight for everything that is going on in my life. and you should be thankful too for what means most to you because it could all be gone before you know it
So you're Birthday is tomorrow (or today if you are reading this on November 19th) lol, anyways. I just wanted to say Happy Birthday and that I'm glad to call you my friend. You are absolutely amazing, your adorable, sweet and anyone who says different can fuck off. But I hope your day is amazing and wonderful just like you. Love you Ryan. : ) p.s keep smiling, I love your smile.
Thank you very much whoever you are haha but no need to be anonymous about saying happy birthday haha
well here i am! just smoked a bowl and thinkin back on things. and for some reason i can only really go over the past year! so much has happened and ive loved every second! i miss my friends and family DEARLY! including the comfort of living with my parents. have a vehicle, not having to work at fast food, and so much more. but the best things in life are things you work for and once you accomplish them! it is the greatest feeling. tuesday the 22nd were opening for ten second epic on the same night our cd comes out! 7 months in the making and i couldnt be more stoked
I wish that i was younger. Maybe then. These feelings would be different? Stronger? More innocent? Our minds are at the same level. Very intrigued as to what this world is all about. Just one of the many thoughts we share. Our minds could travel this world and have the most craziest adventures. Long boarding California, Surfing Australia,partying with the animals in Galapagos Island & where ever your heart desires I’ll take you there. Just two lovers in-twine kicking it. Enjoying the Herb that was put here to put us in the groove and feel high. Another one of the many thoughts that surround us. Music taste to attitude. I could be anywhere as long as I’m with you. As we grow old and fragile. Our emotions and love grow rapidly stronger. The things i would do to you. The things I would say. If only you knew. The trustworthy, ever lasting, never ending, uncontrollable. Love. I have. for you.
when everything stops working. push on. what makes us all feel amazing is when we accomplish something. and to say you pushed past something difficult that brought you down and you made it past by staying focused and being positive and just dealing with whatever it is that may get you down. THAT is what makes life worth while! I was in a band that I was 110% sure that we would make it big. we were destine to be the next coldplay but from canada. the most AMAZING song writer i have ever come in-contact with. the guy would write 3 hits a day! But great skills arent everything. your attitude has to be there. and that was one thing he didnt have. producers, our manager, our lawyer, his parents, his friends, some of the greatest musicians in the industry. ALL tried to harness him but you cant help someone who doesn’t want to be helped. 1 Month after making the hardest decision to quit. I was talking to Ryan on facebook chat. talking about how i was going back to school and he told me how they were looking for a drummer. a month and a half later on my 21st b-day i took a chance and drove 3 and a half hours to meet up with the guys who i had only met 4 or 5 times. we jammed and the moment we played the first song easy come, easy go! ( a song we NEVER ended up playing live haha) it just felt right and its been like that ever since. This band has accomplished so much already and we haven’t even be a year yet! I dont see this train stopping anytime soon! When i listen to credible witness songs it makes me appreciate where i came from. walter taught me A LOT about song writting and we all taught each other and helped each other grow as musicians. I never forget c dub days. second cup, ians skate shop, johns long dick, game cube in mikes basement, the first time walter said fuck walking up that hill in tecumseh, On the CW days. trips to toronto to hang with greig, being on much music, recording with cone, catching fish on tour, mike almost dying on tour, madawaska 09, whos the pussy?, O AND BY THE WAY WATCH OUT FOR KYLE, HE HAS FUCKING POO STAINS IN HIS PANTS haha all the good insiders! im happy the way things worked out.
I cared about her so much. I loved her for who she was. Didnt matter about her past or how different we were I just gave her the most amount of love and respect and what did I get. A phone call that would change everything. Honestly fuck falling in love and caring for someone. I’m tired of getting let down. I care for someone and they let me down all the time. That’s why I love playing music. Music Dont ditch me. Dont lie to me. Dont cheat on me. Nothing negative happens from it. Just makes me happy and gives me something to look forward too. I love it! I love playing drums. I love making people move with my music. I love that people know the words and sing along! I’m happy with where life has taken me but finding a girl to chill with and hangout with and just share stories with and call mine would be sweet.
The Friend Zone. the place i FUCKING HATE! I have enough friends k. to anyone who is my friend now reading this. this is NOT aimed at you lol i love you as my friends I just would like some love too you know… its nice to be kissed and taken on dates and holding hands too. and another thing… i love meeting new people. i love being friendly. i dont enjoy making people upset. im sorry thats SUCH a bad quality to have. all i ever here is all these people (mostly girls) saying how amazing i am. and how im such a nice guy and i deserve the best and more!…. well ive been hearing that for 3 years now and i still get the same girls ending things with me faster than it starts. For once i would love for a girl to realize how nice of a guy i am and that its NOT a bad thing. would you rather me cancel plans on you on purpose. do you want me to ignore you when im with my friends like i can easily be like most dudes but im not. i guess im just frustrated with relationships. i give so much and get nothing in return. where are you nice girl who would like to have a guy to chill with. if you smoke weed. even better! if not no worries haha we can still kick it sober. and then on weekends go out to a concert or go out somewhere nice. and trust each other with the best intentions.
you have made me feel as though you have interest and that you like me but then i see you saying things along the same line to other girls and it is all just a game to you. you are not different then the other guys out there in the world.
im a friendly person. i treat every girl the same with the MOST respect i can. specially people i care about that im close too. but thats all you see is me as a friend… like every other girl im friends with. maybe if you saw the way i was to my girlfriend when i have one you would think different about what you just wrote.
It seems as if it was just a little over a year ago I was packing all my drums in my parents white mini van. Driving 10 blocks to the local skate park and playing with all the bands i looked up too. Blurt, Shotgun Rules, Stereo Goes Stellar and many more. Ians skate shop! I will NEVER forget you. Being 17 in a band with a bunch of 20-22 year olds makes you feel like you are on top of the world. I remember being in grade 6 watching the Fat Lip video thinking how cool it would be to play in a skate park. When i was in grade 6 I thought I would never play a show it was just something i dreamed about. Never would I EVER play at a skate park with 200 people in front of me. But I did. Here I am 5 years later and I’m in a band that toured Canada, Worked with a Juno award winning producer, Had a video on much music on the main rotation… Time flys
The night was dark. But the air. The air was Filled with Emotion. Love. Passion. As I parked the car I couldn’t wait to put my hands all over her. We sat for about 5 minutes which felt like 5 hours waiting for the moment where my lips would touch hers. But being the tease she is its a kiss on the lips and a turn of the cheek. This girl would play with your emotions until you were about to scream then she would show you how sexy she could be and make you feel amazing in a second. We head for a walk. I hold her hand in mine like its the rarest diamond. Gently never letting go. 40 steps in I couldn’t resist I threw her against the wall and showed her how much sexual tension there was. As I kissed her a rush of emotions run over my mind. 10 minutes. Of raw kissing Two teenagers taking chances on some sexual romance. Then it hit me this girl is something else. This is a girl I will never forget. And before I knew it I was at her house dropping her off. Even though that was always my favorite part of every night we ever hung out. I would park right in front of her dad’s place. shut the car off. get out. I stand there and a smile just automatically appears, she runs to me, jumps in my arms and gives me a good night kiss like no other. Her legs wrapped around me tight and her arms on my shoulder sending shivers up my spine. Pretending as if we were in our own world for that 10-15 second breath taking, metal tasting, perfect. Kiss. As you get older you experience lots of things in life and heartbreak occurs a lot but you get over heartbreak. But love. Love you don’t get over. It will follow you for life. You think you forget that kind of girl. Not a chance. That night I went home in hopes of seeing her again soon. The was the last time i kissed her.
Tonight I had a REALLY serious conversation with someone about believing in god… or not? A lot has happened in my life. lots of serious shit other people couldnt even dream of. I am in NO WAY saying im any cooler or harder or more gansta then anyone else but lets just say i have a good amount of demons against me. its strange to beleive that when the ones you love die they will be in heaven rather than just there in the ground chillin and there soul is gone… but there is SO MANY differnet types of religions. how is only one! the right one. And think about what most wars are about… religion or race… its the reason the world hates each other. some hate some because they are black… KKK. Some hate some because they are jewish … Nazi’s. This world is BASED off being better than someone. But what makes us all so different if our insides all work the same. Right now at this point in my life i believe were all just organisms. at the top of the food chain against wild life and animals and the idea of religion was created to help people have comfort in the idea of dying. I mean think about it. when your upset or scared you think some pretty fucked shit… who says that someone could have had this crazy dream about heaven and hell and then it became a story that was thought up and written down in a book and labeled the bible. and someone killed him for it and it got translated a bunch of times and then someone found it 300 years later and translated it like. its all a belief system and anything could or could not be true. BUT the FUCKED UP PART! no lie some of my like top 20 all time fav bands consist of: Anberlin - my favorite band of all time,Goodbye Tomorrow - There song Tragidenne gives me goosebumps everytime the chorus kick and it talks about god always being there for you. Relient K, Switchfoot, Copeland just to name a couple all these bands are christian and have lyrics based of religion. Most of their songs have SUCH a impact on my life and i really feel it when i listen to it. Im just caught in this battle with religion and i dont know what to believe. its almost as if i want to believe in god just to save my ass when i die and dont go to the place they call hell… but i still live my life. i still have sex before marrige. i still smoke weed which is illegal. im pretty sure you have to obey your parents in the 10 commandments…. i think 1-30 of us do that at all times? probably less Religion i could debate forever and still have no confident asnwer in saying god does exist or god doesnt exist. Anyone who is down to chat about this message me or send me a question with your thought i would love to hear them